Cream cheese cherry-choc chip cookies

Yesterday I needed to throw together cookies in a hurry, and didn't have enough butter defrosted, but I did have 1/2 package of cream cheese.  From there, a new recipe evolved based on my normal chocolate chip cookie recipe.  It went about like this...

4 oz. cream cheese, softened

3/8 C brown sugar

3/8 C white sugar

1 tsp vanilla 

1/8 tsp almond extract (Don't skip this!)

1 large egg

1 3/16 C flour (measure 1 1/4 C but scoop out a spoonful)

1/2 tsp baking soda

3 dashes of salt

1/2 C milk chocolate chips

1/2 C cherry chips

Cream together the cream cheese, sugars, extracts, and egg.  Mix in the flour, soda, salt, and then the chips. This will NOT look like the texture of normal cookie dough.  The dough is more...elastic.

Parchment paper recommended even with non stick cookie sheets.  My cookies stuck.  Put small spoonfuls on a cookie sheet.  They hold their shape so you can space them closely.  Bake at 375 degrees for 9-10 minutes, cool on sheet for 2-3 minutes.

These are very chewy and have a good flavor.  If you're trying to use up some melted chocolate, you should try dipping a few of the cookies.  :-)

Nutella Cookies

I really love Nutella.

I haven't used my cookie press in years, and this recipe sounded like fun.  (I did butter instead of shortening.)  Well, my cookie press wasn't cooperating.  I ended up rolling approx. 1" balls, baking about 6 minutes, flattening them, and baking another 5-7 minutes.  They were tasty.  If you like Nutella, I recommend this recipe, either with a cookie press or as balls.  The dough was yummy.

International Candy Exchange

I know, I'm really behind on blogging.  My semester ended last night and I hope to do a little catching up.

My friend Carolin, who lives in Germany, occasionally sends me a little care package of my favorite European chocolate.  One day last year we were chatting and she mentioned that she misses Reese's PB cups and her kids like Swedish Fish candy.  Really?  All that fantastic quality European chocolate and you miss lousy (in comparison) American chocolate?  I bought some and planned to mail a little care package.  Yeah...that was in December.  Finding the right forms to ship internationally...getting to the post office...that didn't happen.  

One day in March, I found out that someone from my department was flying to the Germany area office where Carolin works, and was leaving that afternoon. Carolin was really stressed about the international visitors because it meant big changes at her workplace.  I ran to the store, bought PB cups and Swedish Fish and a perfect greeting card, and gave them to my care-package-delivery-agent.  

A few days later, I got an email from Carolin, showing me the chocolate that was coming my way in return.

More important than my delicious strawberry-yogurt filled chocolates was feeling her support and love.  I was undergoing some medical tests at the very moment I got her email, and it meant so much to me.  I'm grateful for my support system in life - for the friendships that survive distance and time.  

National Infertility Awareness Week

It's National Infertility Awareness Week and I've been reminded frequently by Facebook posts, my favorite IF blog, and emails from Resolve.  I've been torn about whether to post anything, since I'm currently in a holding pattern, but today I decided I should advocate for so many others who are struggling.

I love the Stirrup Queens blog and this post hit me hard.



I might not currently be trying to conceive, but I still:

- Struggle with pregnancy announcements from fertile myrtles, even though I'm happy for them
- Randomly burst into tears when I remember the day I miscarried
- Stress about explaining to a potential future spouse that I have unexplained infertility
- Feel heartache for those who are struggling with infertility
- Stress about TTC once I get married again...I'm not getting any younger
- Understand that having children will not completely resolve the painful memories of IF
- Grieve for those whose struggles have been so much harder than mine
- Struggle not to feel like my body is broken
- Hope desperately that one day my IF will magically disappear according to God's plan for me
- Carry physical scars from surgery and emotional scars from months of failed cycles, trying something new every time

Want to support / read more NIAW blog posts / learn more about infertility?  Check out: http://www.resolve.org/infertility101  (Basic understanding of the disease of infertility.)
http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html (About NIAW)

Easter

Easter should always include a new skirt.  I got this one for $3 at the thrift store a few weeks ago and have been saving it for Easter.  I love it!  It's cute and comfortable.

Easter should never again include a cake called Decadent Chocolate Delight which is made in the crock-pot.  It burned around the edges and the flavor wasn't great.  Thankfully the cookies and cream ice cream made it work out okay.  I'm not sold on crock-pot cakes.

A week's happenings

Monday 3/11 - Called a radio station and won tickets to a performance - so exciting!

Wednesday - Bought a used Love Sac after bargaining down the price.  (Nathan took the old one.)

Friday - Went with a friend to use those free tickets (Calvin Harris in Park City).  I've never been to a performance in a club before...it seems the time on the ticket is when the door opens.  We spent forever people watching.  My friend was getting a cold and feeling worse as we stood around in a room that kept getting hotter and more packed.  When she gasped that she couldn't breathe, we moved close to the door.  She was a good sport to stick it out that long while feeling lousy, but when the show still hadn't started after 11:30pm, I agreed we could leave.  Honestly it was a letdown.  I was hoping for a fun night of dancing but since she was sick, we didn't dance, and then we missed the main event.  Oh well.  Life goes on.

Saturday - Started cleaning up and rearranging the dungeon to put the Love Sac where I wanted.  Vacuum overheated and stopped working.  I should really see if it's working now.
                - Discovered I like birch beer.  (No, it's not alcohol - it's soda.)
                - Went to my first church singles activity since the divorce.  (Grandma - if you're reading this, I'm not looking for a new husband, just some new friends.)  Spent a couple hours playing games and chatting with strangers.

Monday - Had a hard day at work and just plain hurt.  I came home and for a brief moment turned into one of those crazy people.  You know, the ones that say, "I hurt and I'm stressed - let me go for a run to get rid of my pain and clear my mind!"  It worked while I was out there.  I felt good and let go of the stress.  About two seconds after I hit the house, the stabbing pain in my low back and the constant pain between my shoulder blades returned, but now I also had upset lungs, sore feet, and tired legs.  I spent about 40 minutes struggling to breathe normally between the pain and the angsty lungs, propped myself against the shower wall to take a shower, and spent the next little while with an ice pack on my throbbing big toes and a hot pack on my chest.  But hey, it was fun being one of "those people" while it lasted.

Things I'm currently enjoying

My sister pointed out yesterday that half of my posts lately are about running.  Valid point.  It's not that I'm obsessed.  It's that my life is full of change and self-discovery and weaknesses, and with the recent divorce, I'm not comfortable sharing everything in this public venue.  I try to share a little more on FB, because I can limit my audience.  Some people dropped me as a FB friend because of the divorce.  As part of this fun adventure, I've chosen to cut a big chunk of my FB friends.  No longer do I want to add everyone I know from work or prior parts of my life.  I keep dropping people.  If I honestly don't care about your life or staying in touch, or you never bother to say anything to me or acknowledge my statuses/photos/existence, then I don't feel safe having you know all about my life.  If you care enough to want to know what's happening with me, call me.  Text me.  Invite me to hang out.  I'll do the same.

Okay now let's get down to the fun part.  :-)  Things I like right now:

- Going somewhere right after work if I want without having to check in or worry about making dinner

- My emptier-feeling house and kitchen cupboards.  Dividing up the household is an effective albeit painful way to declutter.

- Purple.  It may be taking over blue's position as my favorite color.

- Knights of Shame by AWOLNATION.  It's about 15 minutes long and I like to crank it up in the car every couple days. Or twice a day.  

- Retail therapy.  I've needed to replace some clothing and household items for a long time.  It's fun to make whatever choices I want, as long as I can fit it within budget.

- Rebates from my credit union.  Bought a cheeseburger from In n' Out Yesterday.  After rebate, 17 cents.  Bought the expensive food my cats require to avoid urinary tract crystals and expensive vet visits.  20% rebate.

- Eating like I'm single.  Fast food, frozen dinners, prepared food.  I dirty like one spoon and glass a day.  It's a fun splurge.

- Hot chocolate made with coconut milk.  YUM!

- Not being scared to come home at night to a dark house.  Not scared to be home alone on windy nights when windows are rattling.  The irrational fears have mostly disappeared since I started living alone.

- The new Oz movie.  Saw it opening night.  I didn't even get bored, which is odd for me.  I highly recommend it.  They did a great job of working in elements from the original movie without just copying them exactly.

- My new gray hoodie.  It's soft, warm, comfy, and reminds me of the one my sister loaned me briefly while she was on her mission, until she missed it and reclaimed it.